- Philippines Recap 3. - Just Love & Ladyboys
Just Love. That's one of Wipe Every Tear's T-shirt slogans. Along with "Mercy Wins" and "Refuse to do Nothing." (And if you want to check out their shop to get one of these awesome shirts to help support these women: look no further than HERE!)
Anyway. "Just Love" really seemed to be the theme of our trip and what God has been speaking to my heart. The idea of love in Christianity is so basic, but I'm coming to a better understanding of what pure, Christ-like love looks like actually lived out rather than existing only as an idea.
The people who taught me about this the most were the ladyboys. {This is the accepted term for transgender people in the Philippines} The first night that we were in the PH, we got to meet up with a bunch of the girls from one of the safe houses at an ice cream shop. It was loud and crowded in there, so I sat my introverted self down in a nice corner table. I chatted with the girls already sitting there about their hobbies and stuff - just getting to know them.
I asked one of them what her favorite song was and she went off about Phil Wickham and how his music is so peaceful and how when she worships, her bad situations get put into perspective and then don't seem as bad. I was touched as she spoke because we had just met and already she was opening her heart up to me about some things.
It wasn't until the next day that I found out via the W.E.T. staff that the group of "girls" that I had been hanging out with at the ice cream shop the night before were mostly ladyboys. Because of their excellently done hair and make-up, I had no idea! I was kind of surprised, but then thought, "Would I have treated them any differently if I had known?" I certainly hope not!
That's where "Just Love" comes in.
My love should be the same regardless of where a person is coming from in life.
Again, that's so basic but it becomes difficult when you grow up in a world that loved to draw lines and hand out judgement. The LGBTQ movement is the hot topic of our day, and in America especially the more liberal minded folks are pushing their ideology onto everything. It's all so political when it comes to whether or not to allow a transgender man into the female's bathroom without any concern for women's safety. If you do not use the preferred pronouns for a person, and insist on using the biologically correct pronoun for their gender, you are labeled as hateful. But if you do use the pronoun "he" for a person who was born a "she," the world calls you loving while truth says you're just ignoring basic biology.
But in the Philippines, we were able to set the politics aside and just get to know the ladyboys as they are. It's so eye opening to meet some of these fearfully & wonderfully made people instead of arguing about them. In getting to know them and in seeing how Wipe Every Tear cares for them, I learned so much. The lady boys aren't allowed to work in the bars, so they are "free lancers" on the streets. We offer them the same opportunity as the bar girls: free housing, free education, and a chance for a better life.
Honestly, no one seemed to care that much about the transgender part of their life and that's what the rest of the world seems to fixate on. The truth is, all the girls who come into care have demons that they have to wrestle with. For some it's drug and/or alcohol addiction. For others its smoking. Some are in unhealthy relationships. Some are ladyboys. All have emotional trauma that they have to sort through.
But are any of those issues something that would cause us to not reach out to them? Of course not! Again, just love. Like Jesus, we can't expect anyone to "clean up" their life before coming to us. This is a place for the messy and the broken to come and see God's love at work. Who wouldn't welcome a ladyboy or anyone else into that?
With that being said, here's what loving them in W.E.T's care looks like. It looks like not insisting that they dress like men again because they were born that way. It looks like respecting them enough to use the "her" and "she" pronouns even though it's not biologically correct. Why? Because scientific facts aren't going to win their hearts over to the Lord.
The long term missionary in the Philippines who was hosting our trip put it like this:
"Why would they choose to continue living in our care if we don't respect them enough to say "she?" They won't stay or receive anything we say if we refuse to let them wear make-up or dress in a way that makes them feel beautiful. If we don't love them where they're at, they'll go back to working on the corner because no one is trying to force them to change there."
That made so much sense to me! God doesn't wait for us to sort out each and every issue and sin in our lives before He'll give us His love...we already have it in full! So why would we operate in any other way toward others?
And even for the ones who don't show a single sign of wanting to transition back, is there a better place for them to be? Where else could they go where they will be loved, prayed for and cherished as they are? Come on, church!
A big realization for me was how people {myself included} are so eager to want to correct things in other people. Anything that's different or wrong, we want to fix. But that's not our job! Our job as Christians is to speak the truth in love. Now, when I say "Just Love" I don't mean to say, we should ONLY love. But rather simply love. When it comes to our Christian brothers & sisters it's our job to call things out at times and hold one another accountable, but we can't do that to someone who hasn't claimed Christ yet. You can't hold someone to a standard that they don't set for themselves! So to condemn the ladyboys for their lifestyle choice or insist that they change would be counter productive and likely drive them away because again: correcting them is not our job!
Jesus is the Corrector, His Spirit has to be what convicts them, not our judgments. That was another simple idea that hit me like a ton of bricks: It's not my job to fix anyone! God is the Savior. Duh. He is the Redeemer! He is perfectly loving and good and He calls out to every lost heart. What a relief that I don't carry that responsibility! I simply get to display Christ's love to the best of my ability as He does the rest! Praise God!
~Rebecca Rae
Anyway. "Just Love" really seemed to be the theme of our trip and what God has been speaking to my heart. The idea of love in Christianity is so basic, but I'm coming to a better understanding of what pure, Christ-like love looks like actually lived out rather than existing only as an idea.
The people who taught me about this the most were the ladyboys. {This is the accepted term for transgender people in the Philippines} The first night that we were in the PH, we got to meet up with a bunch of the girls from one of the safe houses at an ice cream shop. It was loud and crowded in there, so I sat my introverted self down in a nice corner table. I chatted with the girls already sitting there about their hobbies and stuff - just getting to know them.
I asked one of them what her favorite song was and she went off about Phil Wickham and how his music is so peaceful and how when she worships, her bad situations get put into perspective and then don't seem as bad. I was touched as she spoke because we had just met and already she was opening her heart up to me about some things.
It wasn't until the next day that I found out via the W.E.T. staff that the group of "girls" that I had been hanging out with at the ice cream shop the night before were mostly ladyboys. Because of their excellently done hair and make-up, I had no idea! I was kind of surprised, but then thought, "Would I have treated them any differently if I had known?" I certainly hope not!
 |
| Another night down "Walking Street" |
That's where "Just Love" comes in.
My love should be the same regardless of where a person is coming from in life.
Again, that's so basic but it becomes difficult when you grow up in a world that loved to draw lines and hand out judgement. The LGBTQ movement is the hot topic of our day, and in America especially the more liberal minded folks are pushing their ideology onto everything. It's all so political when it comes to whether or not to allow a transgender man into the female's bathroom without any concern for women's safety. If you do not use the preferred pronouns for a person, and insist on using the biologically correct pronoun for their gender, you are labeled as hateful. But if you do use the pronoun "he" for a person who was born a "she," the world calls you loving while truth says you're just ignoring basic biology.
But in the Philippines, we were able to set the politics aside and just get to know the ladyboys as they are. It's so eye opening to meet some of these fearfully & wonderfully made people instead of arguing about them. In getting to know them and in seeing how Wipe Every Tear cares for them, I learned so much. The lady boys aren't allowed to work in the bars, so they are "free lancers" on the streets. We offer them the same opportunity as the bar girls: free housing, free education, and a chance for a better life.
Honestly, no one seemed to care that much about the transgender part of their life and that's what the rest of the world seems to fixate on. The truth is, all the girls who come into care have demons that they have to wrestle with. For some it's drug and/or alcohol addiction. For others its smoking. Some are in unhealthy relationships. Some are ladyboys. All have emotional trauma that they have to sort through.
But are any of those issues something that would cause us to not reach out to them? Of course not! Again, just love. Like Jesus, we can't expect anyone to "clean up" their life before coming to us. This is a place for the messy and the broken to come and see God's love at work. Who wouldn't welcome a ladyboy or anyone else into that?
 |
| Photo taken on our hike up Taal Volcano |
With that being said, here's what loving them in W.E.T's care looks like. It looks like not insisting that they dress like men again because they were born that way. It looks like respecting them enough to use the "her" and "she" pronouns even though it's not biologically correct. Why? Because scientific facts aren't going to win their hearts over to the Lord.
The long term missionary in the Philippines who was hosting our trip put it like this:
"Why would they choose to continue living in our care if we don't respect them enough to say "she?" They won't stay or receive anything we say if we refuse to let them wear make-up or dress in a way that makes them feel beautiful. If we don't love them where they're at, they'll go back to working on the corner because no one is trying to force them to change there."
That made so much sense to me! God doesn't wait for us to sort out each and every issue and sin in our lives before He'll give us His love...we already have it in full! So why would we operate in any other way toward others?
And even for the ones who don't show a single sign of wanting to transition back, is there a better place for them to be? Where else could they go where they will be loved, prayed for and cherished as they are? Come on, church!
A big realization for me was how people {myself included} are so eager to want to correct things in other people. Anything that's different or wrong, we want to fix. But that's not our job! Our job as Christians is to speak the truth in love. Now, when I say "Just Love" I don't mean to say, we should ONLY love. But rather simply love. When it comes to our Christian brothers & sisters it's our job to call things out at times and hold one another accountable, but we can't do that to someone who hasn't claimed Christ yet. You can't hold someone to a standard that they don't set for themselves! So to condemn the ladyboys for their lifestyle choice or insist that they change would be counter productive and likely drive them away because again: correcting them is not our job!
Jesus is the Corrector, His Spirit has to be what convicts them, not our judgments. That was another simple idea that hit me like a ton of bricks: It's not my job to fix anyone! God is the Savior. Duh. He is the Redeemer! He is perfectly loving and good and He calls out to every lost heart. What a relief that I don't carry that responsibility! I simply get to display Christ's love to the best of my ability as He does the rest! Praise God!
~Rebecca Rae
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